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In their own words
Mariel Elguero

Mariel Elguero attended Smith College where she majored in English and minored in Spanish. She is a 2004 New York City corps member and she taught eighth grade English at MS 118 in the Bronx.

October 13, 2005.

I'm one month into my second year of teaching and things are going as planned, if not better. I wake up every morning excited to see my kids. My classroom feels energetic and my eighth grade students are invested in the work we are doing. That is, all except for one. His name is Ricardo, and I cannot seem to get through to him. Even on the first day of school, Ricardo seemed withdrawn and uninterested. The first assignment I gave my students was to write a letter to me as a way of introducing themselves. Most of my students were eager to please and asked for extra pieces of white lined paper. Ricardo, however, handed in a practically blank piece of paper. The one line read, "My name is Ricardo Luis. I am 14 years old and my only interest is math." From the diagnostics I have gathered, Ricardo is two to three grade levels behind in reading. He has difficulty communicating his interests when I try to pick out a book with him and doesn't even reply to most questions I ask him. Every night, as I try to fall asleep Ricardo appears in my thoughts. Today, Ricardo had homework detention for the third time this week. As he sat quietly at his desk staring at his paper, I approached him.

"Why didn't you do your homework last night, Ricardo?" No answer. "Did part of the homework confuse you?" Ricardo shook his head in frustration. "I don't know," he said, clearly agitated. "What's the point of doing English homework anyways?" For the first time, Ricardo really talked to me. He told me that he started to hate school way back in elementary school when he scored a one on the state English Language Arts Exam, meaning that he was performing far below state standards. Math was the only subject he enjoyed, partly because he adored his sixth grade math teacher, a strong veteran at our school.

Ricardo, a student who never misbehaves, simply stopped doing work and stopped asking for help years ago. Because of his unassuming nature and the fact that he manages to pass his classes, he has slipped through the cracks year after year. At this point, it's apparent to me that Ricardo feels frustrated with school and has stopped believing that things can be different for him. Furthermore, Ricardo clearly doesn't believe that I am the teacher to reach him and change things.

December 23, 2005

Today was our last day of school before winter break. As soon as I opened my apartment door, my phone started ringing. It was Ricardo.

"Miss. E., I finished the book already and started the sequel," he half shouted into the phone.

"It was the best book ever Miss. E. I can't wait to finish all three in the series." After countless visits to the library, Ricardo is finally picking out good books for himself. I have also convinced him to enroll in an after school reading program that I run. His reading level has already increased by over one grade level in just the first half of the year. After discussing his current book for a half hour, his mother called him for dinner. I reminded him to write his book responses over break and he assured me that he wouldn't forget.

"Ricardo, you sound like a changed man," I praised him as we said goodbye. After a short pause, he replied, "I am the man," and hung up the phone.

The changes I have seen in Ricardo over the last three months have been dramatic. At the first parent conference night, after explaining to his mother that I was concerned about his progress, I learned that Ricardo was diagnosed with a mild case of autism when he was three years old. Ricardo sees the school counselor a few times a week, but he doesn't receive any additional academic support and he has not been tested in 10 years. Although Ricardo's case is mild, our difficulties communicating finally made more sense to me. I had some experience dealing with a mildly autistic student in my first year of teaching and had done substantial research to figure out how to teach him. Ricardo and I began meeting every day during lunch to create checklists and calendars to structure his work time in class and at home.

Ricardo comes to my room during lunch to work on English assignments every day without fail. With each task and assignment we cross out on our daily "to do" list. I see Ricardo's confidence growing. I try to think of ways to integrate math into my English class to keep Ricardo invested. Ricardo loves making graphs on my laptop to measure his growth, and it's clear to me that he trusts me more as his teacher now that he can clearly see his progress. In our most recent unit, Ricardo scored a 37 percent on the pre-test and a 91 percent on the post-test. After graphing his scores, he turned to me and said, "Miss. E. Look at all the things you made me learn."

Despite all of the progress, Ricardo's last comment flusters me. Why does Ricardo still think I am the one mainly responsible for his growth?

March 28, 2006

Over the last few months, I have consistently looked for ways to help Ricardo see how he is the one driving his success in my classroom. We began to keep track of the hours he spent in my class making up work, reading independently, studying for quizzes, and the number of times he raised his hand in class to participate and ask for help. He recently decided that he is going to carry around a list of our vocabulary words in his pocket so he can study them in between classes. The other day, I quizzed him on the word "placate" and he got stuck.

"You didn't teach..." he started to say before he caught himself. "I mean...I need to study that word more. It's my responsibility."

After school today, Ricardo did something surprising: He challenged another student from a different class to an English Language Arts "show off." They asked me to quiz them on the skills from the last unit. Ricardo answered first for every single question, leaving his competitor in the dust. He then continued, once the game was over, to recite the meaning of all the vocabulary words listed on the wall. When he was done, the other student looked at me and said, "and you taught him all that?" Before I could answer, Ricardo jumped in.

"Well, she taught it, but I was the one who studied everything and did all the work." Finally, the answer I have been looking for.

Getting Ricardo to the place where he is now has taken great persistence and creativity—and we still have many hours of work ahead of us to make sure that he is ready to move onto high school—but the journey has been amazing. I've been able to reach Ricardo, to help him find a new love of reading and learn important skills. Most importantly, however, I believe I have been able to help Ricardo see that he is in control of his own success and that he is responsible for his future.

Note: Some names have been changed in order to protect the privacy of individuals.

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